2020 is a tough time and I know I left the community, but I feel like this needs to be addressed. I'm gonna share how I went through a tough time in 2019 to where I am now in 2020. Keep in mind this is a personal post, but I'm doing this for you guys to give anyone that might be having a tough time in 2020 some inspiration to be more positive. As being said, I'm going to get started. Coming into 2019, I had already had some personal issues going on. But it's when summer of 2019 stuff started crashing down for me. I'm not sure if any of you are familiar with the streamer who was known by 'Etika', but if you are I'm sure you know what happened to him. Now I won't share what happened to him for obvious reasons, but if you would like to know you can always look it up for yourself to see. But either way, when that happened it put me in a bad state of mind because he was one of my favorite streamers to watch, and knowing that I wouldn't be able to ever see him stream again pretty much broke me. The following month, my close family member had went missing for 6 days, and I'm sure you know the rest of what happened when he was found and that honestly made me feel hopeless, and helpless. Felt that there was no purpose, and yea I was honestly considering finding my way out of here. I was already jealous, and selfish of a lot of stuff behind the scenes but I'm not going to get into that too much. Fast forwarding to August, I had lost 2 people that I considered to be, well one of my best friends. Not going to say any names, but both had cut me off for the same reason. They both still really cared about me of course, but I was selfish and thought I had nobody and showed my jealousy a lot of the time. Fast forward that, after a few months of me just being sad and stuck in my head. My grades had started slipping, I really had no one to communicate with, and that's also a reason why I had left last year. So for the rest of 2019, I was depressed.


Starting 2020, I'm back in the community. No one really knew but I was still sad about the stuff that had happened in 2019, but either way. My 2020 started off as I guess you could say, a wake up call. Somebody had told me that the way I was going on about my health, was wrong and that there could be better ways to cope with it rather than bringing down others with me just because I was feeling that way. Shout out to that person, because I actually took their advice and became a more selfless person. But, I was still stressed about a lot of stuff that had happened in 2019. Starting April of 2020, there's quarantine and that's when I made the one and only Quaratine Hub. You know, all bored in quarantine we'd have fun and all that stuff. Just having a good time, that didn't last long but it was a lot of fun while it lasted.


Now, this is where the turning point starts. In summer of 2020, I had found someone that goes by the name of Spiritual SO. As low as a mind state I was, he would always tell me that. I wasn't my thoughts, and you make your own reality. You can be anything you want, to start taking care of yourself, and your energy is the most important thing in this world. From that day forward, I started to take care of myself more. Started to focus on myself and what's best for me more. Started to look at what I needed to do to start being more happy and what's best for myself, I might have lost some people in the mean time of it. Some people thought I had just forgot about them. But in the end, I'm more happy with myself than ever. I'm living my best life, there isn't any negative energy around me anymore, and I just feel that I'm living the best I could be right now. Guys, you are not your thoughts. You make your own reality, and for me to go through all the stuff I went through last year. Me feeling helpless, hopeless, and worthless. To feeling that I'm living my best life. Then you can do it too. You all have a purpose, 2020 is not the time to be sad about the environment around you man. This is the year to take care of yourself, channel that negative energy into something positive. Exercise, get nature, and do what's best for yourself. Listen, I am not perfect by any means. I will still get sad, mad, and even depressed. I am human after all, but when that time does come around again. I'm going to be confident in myself still and knowing that I can push through it.


Because guess what, God's toughest warriors go through the toughest challenges. You guys, 2020 is a horrible year. Kobe died, there's explosions out there, and we're losing a lot of people in our world. But that should not distract from who you truly are, who your higher self is. Take care of yourself, do what's best for you. Trust me, I was about to make my way on out of here in 2019. But I am still here in 2020 knowing, that whatever this world throws at me next. That I'm going to be able to fight through it, and I can get past it as long as I keep a positive attitude about it. The more negative you think, the more negative stuff will come your way man. In times like these where everything is rough, we need to start focusing on what's best for ourselves and not what's bringing us down as humans. It's okay, if I can get through all the times where I felt like it was my final days and where I felt helpless and that no one's there for me. Then you can too, you don't always need other people for happiness when you're a beautiful human yourself. Might sound corny, but hey I'm a lot more happier than I was last year, and you guys can be too. This is just goes to show, if you fall. You are always meant to get back up, think positive and put the ego to the side. You're not your thoughts, you are an amazing soul living a human experience. Times like these are tough, and this is where you need to take care of yourself more.

With that being said, I hope you guys are doing well and taking care of yourself and being your best self. Administration please don't delete this, because I want to give people some of my energy to get them through all the horrible stuff that's happened in 2020. But anyways, I hope you all been taking care of yourself. Be you, and channel that bad energy into something positive and productive. Alright that's all I gotta say here, I am making my way out now.

Amazing, Great job, stay safe.