around like 3 thousand years ago, I had a pet cat, this pet cat was like my best friend.

His name was 'Bicat' or something idk I wasn't good with names. And I remember one day Bicat went out, and thhen it got squashed by Uade

Uade killed my cat, and im still upset to thhis day, at 3849 years of age. Curse you Uade ;(

*sets glass down*
Well that's a good story son, but my ex-wife leaving me was definitely more tragic.

Both of those are very tragic stories I’m sure. But at least you weren’t kidnapped before you were even a day old and raised by the nazgul!